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Quasars and Fluff

by Blokeacola

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oldindiekid Imagine if Beck wrote the White Album after scrapping the internet chat rooms? Play this and discover 30 fantastic and varied tracks to get lost in. It may seem daunting but give it a chance and enjoy these fascinating songs and clever cut up lyrics from the Welsh Wizard. I’m on my third listen and each song is my favourite until the next one! Definitely the best album yet from the legendary Blokeacola! Favorite track: Mayonnaise Lifestyle.
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1.
Please mind the ever-widening gap The banality of evil, I'm seeing it now Forced to worship at the temple of bureaucratic doom A coup in search of a legal theory You're as scary as a hen do in Blackpool Chow down on your ultimate dinosaur drumstick Chew your way through another impossible fossil You're a sycamore seed, blowing in the breeze Just one more spinning propeller Lost here, lost there, lost everywhere As subtle as an MC Hammer Stop! Monster, monster Nuke the hurricane I'm impaled on logic's railings Scrolling by the dummy drive thru Rap rap rapping on hell's window Frozen planet go melty melty Still kowtow to high society Feeding on simulacrumbs In a halcyon daze The trauma of an Etonian The cuddly face of persecution, Paddington Kamikaze white clothes courage Pound shop Westworld laps of shame Has the world spun off its axis? His heart's still beating but he's gone Suspension of disbelief Patch me up and send me in Lackadaisical lackeys are marching In time with a fool's anthem Suspension of disbelief Shrewd move plain sight maw worm Shaken not stir crazy Stand firm for a second term Good little germ
2.
At the Famous Doctor Pavilion Edward Jenner's nowhere to be seen There is always a second opinion Endless buffering and buffoonery I'm as weird as Bin Laden's hard drive But I think it's time you start to act your wage They don't seem to know I'm quiet quitting I try to stay cryptic and ignored At the Famous Doctor Pavilion I found a nurse to check my pulse He said, you're only barely living Why don't you charge your lonely phone? Everywhere is exploding heads Depress, repress, oppress and undress It's nice to be somewhere without TV He tapped into his glowing rectangle
3.
Novichok 02:30
Do you enjoy watching the banquet, while slowly sinking in the sand? A world made of fuzzy felts, it's a blanket celebration of the bland Give me the Novichok, I'm counting on you to rescue, set me free I am the glacier, you're the mountain Modern slavery doesn't seem all that modern to me
4.
I feel as crazy as Robin Friday And how I wish that it was a Friday But now I've realized it's a Friday I'm feeling crazier than Robin Friday It's kind of an aligned with Pie day A watch all his videos online day A sit around in my pants day A feeling starved of romance day Elliott Smith's teenage mullet Shocked me to my senses But it shouldn't shock me Given the timeframe That he went to school How many mushrooms do you know? There's porcini and portobello I haven't eaten a portobello for far too long MUSHROOM (mumble) MUSHROOM (murmur) MUSHROOM (mushroom) MUSHROOM (mushroom mumble murmur) The more you want it, the more it won't happen When you don't want it, you'll get it and won't want it Asshole, crash hole, car crash asshole Mayonnaise lifestyle Asshole, crash hole, car crash asshole Mayonnaise lifestyle You're a car crash asshole The more you want it, the more it won't happen When you don't want it, you'll get it and won't want it
5.
The planet doesn't have time for this What the hell were we thinking?
6.
Hippopotamus 02:52
The hippopotamus, that was on top of us Was a Florida man, for every day of the year I'm so relieved that it's safe to remove my hardware Thank you computer, for telling me it's OK The Chicago Bulls logo, when it's upside down Looks like a robot doing a crab I just thought I'd throw that in there No need to thank me If I'm not enough for you, upgrade to premium I'm a sandwich maker, of the highest order And what does a Proud Boy actually have to be proud of? Answers on a postcard, if you please The old man fell in love with his arthritis It always made him weak at the knees I just thought I'd throw that in there No need to thank me
7.
Something about a lost connection Immaturing with advancing age Just another monk that owns an iPhone And gets his funding from the CIA Intoxication for the intoxicated Cut your political teeth From the safety of your bed and breakfast I'm sure there are better things that I could do with your time Than stare at photos of Euro 96 goalkeepers Marginalize my universalism, please Regurgitate your great replacement theory My circadian rhythm is one lone bongo Let me introduce you to the art of the goof I have enough red flags to start an online store, if you want to Let's watch the bomb disposal robots From the safety of my bedroom window He shot two zebras then played tennis His critics call him out of touch If right wing populists are careless That doesn't surprise me much Something about a lost connection (Connection lost a about something) Is how I choose to spend my day I do not give you much attention (Attention much you give not do I) Try not to fritter it away Something about a lost connection (Connection lost a about something) Razzle dazzle pygmalion Something about a lost connection Emergency first responder alien Something about a lost connection Something about a lost connection
8.
These days drug dealing is an honest profession When you really think about it I'm scared Jordan Peterson's haemorrhoids Will soon be coming for everyone I am wearing daddy shoes And I am wearing dad issues On my fast fashion sleeve I think I will google cow trampling statistics Just to take my mind off this And these pretentious vignettes Won't do anything of any real substance now But at least they stop me reaching For that bottle of Russian balsam In the kitchen cupboard Fuchsia lips, temporary blips Warhammer nerds, tropical birds What was arcane becomes mundane Swept up in endless hurricanes So let's just fight this raging fire With a minute squirt of gasoline So let's just fight this raging fire With a minute squirt of gasoline
9.
Bobby Balloon stormed into his room Listening to Jay-Z on Tidal He was filling with gas And increasing in mass But the science was not on his side now Bobby Balloon was just a cartoon And he didn't even know Swell swell pop went Bobby Balloon And that was the end of Bobby Balloon Annabella Sphinx went out for some drinks With the Lords and the Ladies of the District She was offered a crust But it turned into dust And all she had left was a biscuit For Annabella Sphinx it was just high jinks But she didn't even know Chip chip crumble went Annabella Sphinx And that was the end of Annabella Sphinx Duncan Sprawl listened to a call That was not for him to hear He didn't want to lose This front page news And everybody drowned in the tears Duncan Sprawl was heading for a fall And he didn't even know Tear tear rip went Duncan Sprawl And that was the end of Duncan Sprawl
10.
The Grand Canyon Nuclear weapons Strip lighting in the sand Beautiful places Ugly people Sometimes they go Hand in hand Heaven on Earth Ignorant locals Architecture somewhat bland Beautiful places Ugly buildings Sometimes they go Hand in hand You may think it's picturesque But they will run you out of town You will think the town is pretty Until they knock you to the ground Beautiful places Ugly people I remember where I came from Being threatened So we ran Beautiful places Ugly people Sometimes they go Hand in hand Reagan's babies Thatcher's children There's no telling where they land Beautiful places Ugly people Sometimes they go Hand in hand
11.
Bushwhacker 05:26
What will it take for us to become more forward looking? If you try sometimes, you just might find You get what you get £150000 a minute A concrete fortress, fireworks and military jets Bushwhacker Wake me up from my dream Bushwhacker Drunkards, fools, killers and thieves Carlos says, I'm a beam of light from the mind of God And I appreciate the sentiment, really I do But I suspect that Carlos might have taken LSD It's 2023, it's not the Summer of Love Bushwhacker Winter winds howling like hounds Bushwhacker He'll put us all in the ground Bushwhacker Blame not favours for thee Bushwhacker Agenda warming the sea I don't want to take an IQ test because I don't want to find out the result Ultraman gangbang storm-ravaged state of mind Prairie oyster breakfast for the troll Bushwhacker Empty landscape bringing me down Bushwhacker Prising all the jewels from the crown Bushwhacker What goes around doesn't come around Bushwhacker Not one kitten she wouldn't drown I don't really need to take this red pill now Can I have a hot buttered croissant? It's like extreme right-wing bukkake in here They want to tell you what you want Allegorical or metaphorical Bizarre is better than banal The early stages of your universe As senseless as they are brutal Bushwhacker On the way to Disneyland He saw a dead pig on the motorway It was not a part of the attractions But he enjoyed it anyway Bushwhacker
12.
Crouching Crouch hidden Crouch Superspreader line of sight Demonise the workers Put your tongue up the crack of the establishment That'll see you right Benevolent malevolence I'm cautiously pessimistic Innocent bystanders twisting the knife Wearing stupid like a badge of honour It's like a bad dream Like being trapped in a lighthouse with Roy Keane And there's more brains in a sausage Unless you're in a pig skyscraper And you can admire the view But you're on top of a pig skyscraper
13.
Strawberries in winter weird me out But I will eat them all the same We are just internet friends now Anger is a slow-working venom Strawberries in winter weird me out Bill Gates and my son's friend's dad Messing with 5G bats About as believable As Gregory becoming a truck Tribal trouble treble trouble Tribal trouble trouble trouble Tribal trouble treble trouble Trouble trouble tribal trouble Don't think for too long about the fact That migrant hunt is now a headline It's true days off will feel like the blink of an eye But at least the clocking in machine says thank you Don't think for too long about the fact Basically famous Basically done When will North Korea see fit to pay Sweden? They took delivery of all those cars They turned me into gammon by messing with Dahl Idiot savant's still a savant Just give me something that I want Then give me something I don't want Idiot savant's still a savant Just give me something that I want Then give me something I don't want I'm eating strawberries in the wintertime
14.
Boomer Tomb 04:10
Welcome to my boomer tomb Would you like to try my SodaStream? I apologise for the mess And the death of my 20th century dream I came here to tell you That I've never heard of this person you've heard of Sobbing is surrender Marvel at my patchwork personality My soul is an unfinished painting Could you please fill in the gaps? Precis it down Don't forget to sign up for my cod psychology course I'm a caricature of a caricature I think I'll just lie down Over here
15.
I don't want to try Taekwondo In his condo tonight Jesse always wants to wrestle Always to playfight I like to play video games Maybe watch some TV But if I turn my back on him He'll soon be attacking me I'll soon be tumbling down Then he will pin me down I think I finally lost my mojo In the "dojo" tonight Jesse kicked my ass again I tried to be polite Why can't we play video games? Or maybe watch TV? But then I turned my back on him And he roundhouse kicked me Jesse, we will never go into business now Not that you ever produced a viable plan I'd be grateful if you would consider Giving me back that 15 grand Jesse, I need it for my mother's operation Jesse, what do you get from my humiliation? Jesse, so many big ideas above your station Jesse, you need another outlet for your frustration But why when those nice girls came round Did you choose to throw them out? And why when I have bad concussion Would I want a second bout? You know that I have German family It's offensive to say "kraut" It isn't just the protein shake That leaves a nasty taste in the mouth Jesse, it's been real fun and all But you are almost 34 It's time that you repaired this broken friendship And the hole in the living room door Jesse, what you swinging those nunchucks for? Jesse, why you taking that sword off the wall?
16.
He ran out of epithets Before he knew what one was Authentic foreskin of Christ, he says Prince Andrew memorial grope I'm talking to a robot in Nebraska When I should be listening to disco octaves If I am frightened of nothing It's nothing to be frightened of French press Gegenpress Corby trouser press Are we capsized by our dalliances? Ass milk mensch Won't you ape this specious reasoning? I'm an angry fossil I'm annoyed I'm an annoyed Ammonoid Engines burning out at full throttle It's been eluding us since Aristotle And we've all been drunk by the bottle We've been deluding us since Aristotle Look at all the hug refuseniks Taking joy in the disconnect The British bulldog shit spirit Sadly truncated by injuries Where's my 48 hours at Rockfield? Fighting time like Zidane on Materazzi Your yoga mat can't save you And it doesn't even make a very comfortable bed From billion year old rock To Range Rover rock I'll be your rock Because despite all your rage You are still not Nicolas Cage And it's as sad as finishing a Big Mac But Harry has a one love armband So everything is fine now Engines burning out at full throttle It's been eluding us since Aristotle And we've all been drunk by the bottle We've been deluding us since Aristotle
17.
I am naked from the waist down I am naked from the waist down I'm staying inside But I'm out on the town I am naked from the waist down Tyranny is over there And London is open for business Does the wife beater get a knighthood, Just because he's your dad? Is the biggest criminal gang in fact the government? Your print media stooges Seem superficially plausible But they are naked from the waist down Yes they are naked, Eric, from the waist down Objective and balanced? I like how that sounds But they are naked from the waist down Are we ranting our way to success, From one perceived injustice to another? Or are we just simply baby monkeys Clinging to adopted wolf mothers? Do we mean what we post? Or is it all just striking a pose? Tap tap tapping on my keyboard I guess that I am posing right now And so I'm naked from the waist down Yes I am naked from the waist down There's no substance to my so-called art I'm just fooling around I am naked from the waist down Celebrity pawns Celebrity porn The politics of envy The politics of scorn Conducting most of my business from my gold plated toilet It's quite the power move to exercise control While I am sitting While I am naked From the waist down
18.
Good afternoon Sad Saturday suit Keep consecrating that coronation oil Infinite pigs at infinite troughs Good afternoon Unless you're having a tennis tantrum The news was a goldmine of dipshittery this morning Look out for the flock of stochastic parrots Good afternoon A match made in heaven in hell No ego ramp for me Only a downward self-esteem slope Please collect the debris for my family A match made in heaven in hell Quit the non sequiturs A match made in heaven in hell Scintillating scimitar A match made in heaven in hell Good afternoon And do you have a boon for my boon? Prepare for the onslaught of psycho chatbots Please alert our ten mutual friends I got my mojo shirking I'm the world's worst sugar father At least that's something to be proud of Son, never wash a bumble bee I got my mojo shirking A can of Tab Clear and some Walkers Hot & Fruity Why doesn't anyone remember? Good afternoon
19.
Please Simon, I know I've been bad But don't you put my life on your podcast Sorry Diana, I can't save you now Who do you think I am, SuperTed? I'm a depraved individual Watching depraved individuals But with the detachment of a smartphone Moon Daddy, I've got something to say to you Apologies if my pregnant pauses are showing now How I wish this was your salary not your phone number At this point in time, well, I might as well be a leaf blower Rearranging the remnants of my scattered mind
20.
21.
All these acquaintances But which ones are your real friends? This wheelie bin's on fire I am the drone pilot Causing destruction from some far-off land Bermuda Triangle I fear that you're the place for me now This wheelie bin's on fire You cannot douse volcanoes erupting in my hollow head It is a shame that we don't see one single star in our night sky... This wheelie bin's on fire ...Glimmer This wheelie bin's on fire And country boys and girls don't dare to look each other in the eye... ...Shy young lover This wheelie bin's on fire No girl ever glided by And touched the brim of your cowboy hat But that's as necessary as an appendix So why you choose to worry about that? We're surrounded by baffling scaffolding With everything and nothing to do Sometimes I feel like I'm some politician And nothing that I tell myself is true They're just words to serve an agenda And nothing that I tell myself is true They're just words to serve an agenda And nothing that I tell myself is true They're just words to serve an agenda They're just words This wheelie bin's on fire
22.
Getting all worked up about a Sonic the Hedgehog film Living in an antique country This asshole is ready and puckered up Waiting for smoke to be blown Excuse me while I go out of my way To try and get a rattlesnake bite I want to be outside not inside the room I'm a man of illegal substance As chic as a visible panty line Pressing buttons with my knuckles Harakiri hamster guilt Are our baseline realities even the same? Living in an antique country
23.
Carrion 05:26
We're fly-tipping on a wasteland scrub We see ghosts emerging from the undergrowth And I can't stand to see you weep When I'm so numb I cannot cry Yes I'm so numb I cannot cry anymore I've been here so long that I am circling the vultures But I can't swoop in their humble sky anymore Death to the truth and all of her truculent children Become my carrion She is only Grace by name Sticks her thumb up to say that it's tickety-boo Because tickety-boo means it's OK But it's never going to be OK anymore Become my carrion Am I so dumb I can't learn lies anymore? Like their broken system, we ossify Till I can't soar in your open sky anymore It's death to the truth and all of her truculent children Become my carrion I'm so numb I cannot cry anymore Become my carrion Am I so dumb I can't learn lies anymore? Become my carrion I'm so numb I cannot cry anymore Become my carrion Am I so dumb I can't learn lies anymore? Become my carrion
24.
Mulling over The ending of The Sopranos I was distracted By a multi-function window cleaning brush I'm always attracted To that which will destroy us I'm alone on a clifftop And I'm chasing down mountain goats I left all my eggs In one basket which I then set on fire I was trying to avoid Scatalogical quips But one slipped out Mulling over how Bill Wyman Was almost his own son-in-law I was distracted By a somewhat fitting play on words Why man? You can't meditate Or deep breathe the apocalypse away Misfortune goes viral And on this heavenly myriad I'm chasing down mountain goats
25.
Darling it's sometimes hard to reach you Given I don't know where you are I don't quite know just how I find you But if I'm holding my guitar I know you might drop by So I devote my life To a troublesome lie I could have been an academic Sometimes you say that I still can But I don't think that you quite get it I wasn't made for making plans I'm carried on this tide And I can never hide From this troublesome lie However much I try
26.
Intellectualising whacking off Wipe till you can only see blood I'm doxxing your paypig Chemtrails and banshees Money to spend Comic book templates Cash cow rear end Colonoscopy Take it as a chance to lie down, my friend Can I take it to the bridge? Yes you can take it to the bridge But don't throw the baby in the water Here's your two minute pop song, Caroline
27.
Tato Head 03:09
With this much small dick energy We can harness enough juice To power the whole grid Sublime and useless truth Black mould hovel Russian sausage tycoon Disconsolate in the consulate You're a prisoner In your mansion of fiction Republican Jesus Highlight the cost of living From the comfort of your palace You're not my real dad And you're not the real Santa I'd rectify this lousy situation But I lost the cheat codes...
28.
Talk to my hand Because my hand is glistening And then you can shower me With confetti conceit My brain's becoming Like a dial-up modem Influencer influenza girl Triggered with increasing frequency Catching the reactionary virus Like a fungal zombie If something wonderful's afoot Then something evil will try To blow it out the water If something wonderful Is blown out the water Then something evil will try To snatch it from the air I get the feeling I am going round in circles Or triangles Or dodecahedrons Click on endless links And someone's bound to hack you That's not a metaphor That's real life Even when you trick yourself To live a lie I am in the bozo zone I can't strike quite the right tone I'm thousands of miles from home Did I make a bad decision? Constantly misunderstood I can't see the trees for the wood I would opt for something good But I'm wracked with indecision There's always something in the way My home is where I never stay Mother, when you went away, Did you make a bad decision? How can we ever know, If it's a bad decision?
29.
Won't you show me your nihilist stripes? I'm the bellend of the ball Barely got a pass At the University of Life Not light enough to fly Iron butterfly Won't you show me your nihilist stripes? Normally I am completely unaware Of my blind spot So I disregard it Nonstop lampoon Infinite cocoon Clever clogs ain't feeling so clever anymore Why am I always slowing down? Singapore man suing his partner For not agreeing to be his partner Elvis Presley's private jet Dilapidated, 260k You don't think that you can afford that You don't think about anything at all, Anne Staying classy, doubling down on The holocaust survivor in the town hall Oh, would you look up there, it's a spy balloon! What day was it when Mr Quaalude came? He gave me a new dress code for my face Won't you give me back my slow-wave sleep? I don't think the power naps are helping me Plane after plane refusing to crash My employer thinks my sickness is a holiday Avatar depression means I'm eating Ice cream at the end of the world Won't show me your nihilist stripes?
30.
I never thought I'd love you And guess what I never did With regards to the stars above you Aren't they really all just satellites? It's not a canal if you don't Find a trolley and a bike It's not a cabal if you don't Try to mount some heads on spikes The politics of offence Or the politics of sitting on the fence Your end of level boss Overstates the benefits And they will trivialise the risk That's the amount before tax Slit your wrists in the bath You wanted peaches and cream But you got a bigger sprout It's all part of the job The goblin's goblet of gob The morning hour, it has gold in its mouth But not for you But not for you And there's nothing you can do But play computer games in the rain It's not for you It's not for you But here is something you can do Play computer games in the rain I didn't turn you on To not enjoy sunshine I only turn you on To try to numb the ache Fake smile at the ready For your Wednesday day of pain Though it's extinction time Hearts may meet and dreams do shine Is it a question of learning how to rationalize, Or learning how to use a gun? The black and white world of the black and whites A charmed life coming undone Your doubly interesting double standards Did you hear about the crush depth rape list? There are all kinds of beauty and we're none of them This is oblique at its bleakest Snuggle up inside the trauma zone Play computer games in the rain Her antipathy to the Antipodes It really drives me insane All quiet on the Western Front The killer of the killer of the killer Now where's that special relationship? What is it that I can't remember? Ignore the source of dark matter Play computer games in the rain 9 o'clock hamster hop up on your wheel And nail that jelly to the wall Nobody cares if the cat is black or white As long as it's a fat ass greedy cat We're muted due to a copyright claim This is more than a trilemma Jumping a shark a second Lesser evil lady shooter She's a laugh out loud assassin Walkie talkie infant zombie Chug that jug of bootleg liquor It's not for you It's not for you And there's nothing you can do But play computer games in the rain

about

Monster monster!

The hotly anticipated double album from Blokeacola is finally here and what a bargain.

This 30 track beast of an LP sees the orange-helmeted, Welsh-born, China-based wizard at the peak of his musical powers and is available in full on Bandcamp only.

Album artwork included in PDF and PNG formats.


'...ambitious and exciting...'

It's Psychedelic Baby Magazine


'Quasars and Fluff is an incredible record!'

The Sound of Fighting Dogs


'...you need to believe me when I tell you it’s all killer, no filler.'

Slacker Shack


'He's the real thing.'

London Peaky


A message from Blokeacola:

I'm a big fan of the White Album so I guess I've always wanted to have a go at making a double album. However, as an artist that has made music for a good few years now, be it in different guises, I only felt ready to begin attempting such a crazy feat during the second half of 2022. I was excited by how trying to write and record this many tracks might affect my creative process. I hoped it would lead to a wider range of material and give me a chance to indulge in more experimentation. After getting more familiar with my new home studio over the course of my two previous EPs, the time felt right.

My previous three releases have featured a very cohesive and distinctive drum sound. I didn't want to abandon this because I love working with a strong groove. Notwithstanding, I wanted more variation sonically so I decided to write some shorter, more acoustic based songs, either using a drum machine or jettisoning percussion almost completely. I feel like this gives the record more staying power, these quieter numbers becoming the fragile threads that hold the fabric of the LP together.

Making a double album during a time when music consumers are becoming more playlist inclined is questionable - some might assert foolhardy. I felt it apt to reference that internal conflict in 'The Planet Doesn't Have Time For This'!

We often feel self-doubt as artists, thinking is this really worth my time and everyone else's? Especially when there are so many options out there for music and the worrying state of the world can make art feel like less of a priority.

We must ride out that self-doubt and carry on trusting our instincts. People need real music more than ever because it provides precious solace and escape. With platforms like Bandcamp it is important to trust listeners to have the capacity and concentration to engage and absorb the works the songwriter wishes to create. If not on Bandcamp then where? This album is designed to be listened to as four sides. The back cover shows four blocks of songs. This gives the listener pause to consider whether they wish to break up the experience, perhaps during different times of the day. However you listen to it, I really hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed making it.

Lots of love x

credits

released October 6, 2023

All songs written and recorded by Blokeacola.

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Blokeacola Newport, UK

Psychedelic pop person.

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